Reflections

     When I think about where I was at this time last year, I'm amazed at how things turned out, considering just how conflicted and confusing things were. This time last year, I said so many goodbyes, and until several months ago, I lived with regret over them. Now, having grown so much from the person I was just a short year ago, I see how one honestly can't live with regret. Those goodbyes meant that last month, I was able to say "hello" and mean it. That's empowering.

     There's a quote that goes something like "When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us," and I think that's really apt to so many situations in life. Admit to yourself daily that things don't last forever. Don't try to hang onto people, because people change, and that's okay, because you do, too. Grow with the people who are going the same direction as you. Don't fight the current just for the sake of fighting it: have a purpose.

     The biggest difference between this time last year and this year for me was learning to think for myself. You'd be surprised at how many of your "original thoughts" actually originate in someone else's head. #inception. We naturally hold our friends in high esteem, sure; they're our friends for a reason. But don't forgo your own thoughts and feelings for someone else's. Nobody wins. I mean, I'm not saying I blunder through life ignoring what people say (at least not everyday!) but I can't stress enough how important it is to take time to think critically about how you feel. Start with the small things, like picking out a unique style of clothing just because you like it, or whatever it is you like best. It'll help when you get to the big things, like knowing when to use advice, and when to consider the source.

      I'm also a huge fan of this little writing exercise: If I could go back in time and tell myself one thing, I would say:__________. I'd tell myself "change is okay." Humans are creatures of habit. How many times have you found yourself naturally gravitating towards the same seat on the bus, or in class, or in the cafeteria? I think so much changed for me last year at once that I wanted at least one rock to hang onto; one tangible thing to grasp while internal and external forces around me shook. It's funny how humans are primordially designed to want sameness, when honestly, the best thing I found was the beauty in being different, and the joy in letting go.

Currently, I'm procrastinating my last research paper of the semester and the fact that I have to study for finals. I guess some things never change. :)

Here's some music to get you through these last few days.

Cheers! --L.N.V.


 This next video's a real gem: A video clip and music by Hudson. First chance I get, I'm going to Australia, you guys. They can't keep hiding all of this indie talent from me forever.